Calm the F down & relax your jaw
My friends, do you ever feel like you are gritting your teeth through life? It’s like, heads down, eyes up, jaw clenched, power through, you can get yourself in order later once you get ALL THE OTHER THINGS DONE ON THE LIST.
I feel like I keep ending up here. And I hate it. I hate it even more because I’m aware of how I am approaching my life and am having a heck of a time breaking through this old habit that has demonstrated time and time again, does not serve me.
Why is that? It literally makes ZERO SENSE. Please tell me if you find logic in or resonate with the following facts:
I am fully aware that I am powering through life right now
It makes me feel sad because I am SURE I’m going to miss all the wonderful things happening around me
I physically feel like poop, especially my jaw, probably because in addition to just feeling like I’m gritting my teeth through life, I probably really am
I don’t feel accomplished even though I’ve packed every minute with something to do
So fully knowing this, why the heck can’t I just flip a switch and change? IT IS MADDENING!
Coincidentally, in the midst of all this swirling, I came across this quote, spoken by a noted Vietnamese Buddist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh:
We do so much, we run so quickly, the situation is difficult, and many people say, “Don’t just sit there, do something.” But doing more things may make the situation worse. So you should say, “Don’t just do something, sit there.” Sit there, stop, be yourself first, and begin from there.
“Don’t just do something, sit there.”
Is anyone else uncomfy reading this quote? I am, because it calls me the F out. I ALWAYS feel like I need to be doing something and sometimes, by doing more things I definitely make the situation worse, even though that isn’t my intention. I know I’m 150% making the situation worse for myself (and honestly my kids and mom because they bear the brunt of my “snappiness”) because I just. keep. moving. There is a dish about to go in the sink, wash it. There is laundry needing to be done, do it. There is a book to read, read it now. There is a conference call in 5 minutes, hop on. There is a child needing something unimportant, get it for them now. There is a kid needing to get ready, get them up. Literally from 5:15a til 10p, I don’t just sit there.
If you are feeling ANY OF THIS, know you aren’t alone. I keep hearing so many people say, “I’m so busy”, “I have so much to do”, “I don’t know how I’m going to do it all”, “I’m exhausted”, and maybe the truth is...we don’t HAVE to do EVERYTHING. Maybe we can just leave the dishes in the sink for a day or two, maybe we can just take an hour to ourselves and read something we find enjoyable, maybe our kids don’t need to take that bath tonight, maybe we don’t have to take a shower today, maybe we can have dinner at 9:30p, you get the idea.
Maybe we need to become more intentional about the “somethings” that we choose to do so we can MAKE the time to just sit there.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to live ANOTHER FRICKIN’ DAY powering through with my jaw clenched, because this is no way to live ya’ll. We are not created to thrive with this much stress in our lives, yet we normalize an insane amount of stress as “ok”. F******ck that, babe (yes, there were multiple u’s used in that swear for effect). We are not supposed to miss out on all these heartwarming moments in our lives and delay things we love to do because we feel like we always need to be doing something for someone or something else or that damn to-do list we made earlier in the week.
I’m rambling, but I think it’s because I needed to be reminded of all this myself too. So maybe another thing we can consider is sitting there and focusing in on all the things that we *are* accomplishing and really leaning into the fact that, it isn’t about the quantity of the things we accomplish, but the quality of the time we spend here on this earth. Don’t just do something, sit there, be yourself first and begin from there ❤️
Lindsey is an encourager, optimist, health + life coach, and yoga teacher who helps caregivers live fuller, healthier, vibrant lives through exploring all aspects of their life and health while helping to cultivate simple, sustainable fun-size habits, so that they can continue to make a meaningful impact in themselves, their loved ones, and the world, for generations to come.
